Thursday, April 5, 2012

Thursday Has a Lot of Silly Hopes

Some days I feel really silly thinking I'm a writer. I've read a ton of authors in their 30s talking about how silly their writing was when they were a teenager which feels like a punch in the gut to me.

I know with time I'll probably learn new tricks to make my writing amazing, but I can't imagine thinking my writing now is silly. I might be silly, but I don't know if I could think that about my writing.

My current WIP is so close to my heart right now. I've never had an idea that I cared about this much. I feel like one of those people who loves a different person every week since I can never stick with an idea, but this idea hasn't been able to let me go. It's grown on me in such a way that it's part of what makes me who I am.

Maybe one day, I'll look back and think it’s silly, but I really hope not.

I hope in 10, 20 maybe even 50 years from now I can look back and remember how amazing I felt writing this story. I hope I don't think it's silly.

I know when those more experienced authors say they thought their old work was silly, they are talking about their skills, but I can't imagine a day where I find my writing, even my skills, is silly. I can't imagine looking at my current WIP and thinking how bad it is.

Maybe I'm silly for thinking in the future I'll still feel the same about my writing and not think "was I on drugs when I wrote this? This is terrible!" I feel silly thinking that because of course over time my writing will get better, but today it's as good as it can be. I hope future me won't feel silly or ashamed of my WIP because that breaks present me's heart.

I know this isn’t a helpful tip or thought provoking, but I just want someone so read this and feel less alone. Even in a world with 7,036,722,861 people, it's so easy to feel alone. That's what so great about the writing community. Everyone is so supportive and just get it. I hope I can be that for someone. I hope someone out there is reading this and feels better knowing they aren't alone. I know I felt alone in the beginning. I felt my writing was silly. I didn't have confidence. I hated posting or commenting because I just felt silly. It took me awhile to realize there are people out there who felt the same way. I still feel silly some days like today, but I'm connected to so many amazing people by our love just to write. It's such a great feeling knowing you are connected with such amazing people in such an amazing way.

It makes me so happy knowing that all of y'all took time out of your day to read my posts. Even of you think I'm silly, I hope there is one person who reads this and feels less alone.

I hope some of y'all send in a post to join YaLit Six. Even if you feel silly doing it, you never know whose life you'll change with the words you have to say. My life has changed so much because of people who just wrote little things on their blog. I hope one day I'll be able to thank them, but today I wanna thank y'all just for reading what I have to say and making me feel less silly.

Remember you aren't alone in this. There are so many people out there willing to be there for you. Please leave a comment of something if you ever need to talk about your worries or anything. We are all connected by our love of writing.

I hope that never changes.